Holly ‘n I ~~~ The Canine Connection 
Marian Silverman, Licensed Family therapist offers consultations for dog related issues for individuals and family members. Marian has been a consultant for the People-Animal Connection Program at UCLA. She is an Animal-Assisted Therapy Specialist and published author of articles about the healing power of the human-canine relationship.
http://www.awarenessmag.com/mayjun08/mj08_take_one_dog.htm
Using a problem solving approach, she will help you create a balanced and stable relationship with your dog. Marian also offers grief counseling after the loss of a pet.
Email for appointment request; include breed and age of dog, and briefly describe your concerns, issues and other pertinent information(i.e. dog’s status in family.
Mabel rescued a darling little terrier mix named Luna. She is a good student, and listens well(the woman, as well as the dog). Mabel implemented all the strategies I suggested and in a short time her dog became calm and submissive. She solved all the “doggie issues.” Or so we thought. Now it’s started again (the misbehavior). The dog barks excitedly every time the woman comes home and acts “wild,” even biting her hand. She doesn’t come when she is called unless she feels like it. This is dominant behavior, the dog is being ‘pushy’ and demanding attention. The dog gets plenty of exercise, so I’ve had her put the dog in “rehab”(so to speak) and start all over again establishing dominance/submission scenario. When she comes home, she is to ignore the dog’s excitement, and offer her nothing, no petting, no treats, no talking. She is not to give the dog any attention until the dog is calm and submissive…lying down and being quiet. And then she may call the dog to her and touch her, tell her “good girl.” Until she sees that, no attention should be given. Otherwise we are reinforcing the excited unruly behavior. When it’s time to go out, she should not call the dog to her. That gives the dog a choice, to come or not to come. I suggested going straight to the dog and putting on the leash, and off they go. No discussion. I’ve told her to simply “Be the leader.” The dog must be the follower. And again it’s working.
I’ve had to explain that it isn’t something you do one time, and when the behavior is better, you stop doing it. I said, it’s like exercise; it’s forever, for if you stop(well, not you…) the fat comes right back. People don’t get this easily. They do what I tell them, and then think the problem is fixed for good. Wrong. It’s everyday…leadership, leadership…so good for women.
November 22
Today Mabel asked: “what if my husband doesn’t follow the program?” He enjoys the excited greeting when we come home and enters into it with Luna. Is this a problem? Do we have to be in synch?
Canine Problem Solving: Family issues
Problem solving might be listening to the littany of undesireable behaviors the dog shows that are troublesome to people, and making a diagnosis of the actual problem that is leading to this behavior. It would involve learning what canines actually need from us…and what it takes to get them balanced…. The canine need for a leader is usually the # 1 cause for a frustrated, or even aggressive dog..as well as the canine need for exercise, and travel (not a back yard;.this is just a larger kennel). The solution is usually an educational process. You will learn to become assertive in the relationship.
A couple that wanted help with their dog complained that the dog was attacking the husband, chasing him out of the bedroom, and not letting him back in bed if he went to the bathroom in the middle of night. The man began to avoid the dog at all cost, as he often got bitten The woman refused to give the dog up, said she’d sooner give up her husband (laughing). It was so clear what was going on. She was the dominant female, and the dog was the male leader. Their entire system was based on the man not having any power in the family. Changing this involved counseling the couple and helping them to see what the real issue was.
An easier problem to solve involved a rescued shelter dog who would urinate in the house as soon as they returned from the walk. I recommended taking the dog out earlier in the day and walking 3times a day instead of twice…problem solved.
Fear/phobia problems can be solved with desensitization….expose the dog in small increments to the source of the fear, and then instead of petting him, and reassuring him softly with affection,(most common mistake), act strong and firm and instill trust in the dog, use firm massage on rear quarters or light neck hold when dog frightened or shaking). Most people tend to offer affection when their dog is afraid, thinking it is reassurance. This is a sure way to keep the fear active, as the dog is being rewarded for it. Reassurance to a canine involves your being the leader he needs and can trust; touching the dog’s neck with fingers in a firm grip as a mother dog’s mouth would do. This lets the dog know he is safe and he can relax. Petting will create the opposite. Give affection when your dog is calm and relaxed, never when he is nervous or fearful or aggressive. November 8, 2008
Family issues may include how the family interacts with the dog, who has the highest status… who is the leader.?..usually it’s the dog, If the dog is aggressive with someone in the family, or unfriendly, learn how the entire family dynamic and the hierarchy of power has created this.
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“It is an important service and she is the perfect person for it. I admire Marian, she is a revolutionary, she is offering something new and unique. This is the stuff that advances humanity”
Jorge Preloran
Professor Emeritus
UCLA
Marian, you helped me immensely during Ella’s illness and when she died (and before that, of course, when you trained us as volunteers at UCLA’s People-Animal Connection). I still have your emails and still can’t read them without crying. Part of it is the fact that I will miss her forever but a lot of it is because you have such a way of getting to the heart of what it feels like to go through the process of saying good-bye.
Cathy Tsao
Former volunteer with Ella, UCLA People-Animal Connection
Puppy raiser and breeder caretaker, Canine Companions for Independence
#1 Chie, 4 1/2-year old F yellow Lab – breeder
#2 Lark III, 3-year old F yellow Lab/Golden Retriever cross – released
#3 Viela II, 2-year old F black Lab – breeder
#4 Yvonne III, 16-month old F black Lab – released
#5 Yvette III, 16-month old F black Lab – service puppy-in-training